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Another piece of poorly punctuated pro-Dobbs hate mail

kburk — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 23:14:17 +0000

Anna writes:

I LOVE Lou Dobbs....his stand on ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION is right on. Those opposing his view of ILLEGAL immigration usually have their own ideology - that is that ANYONE who has a problem should show up in America to have their problem solved by tax-paying Americans. How nice for native-born Americans in the midst of a recession....seeing their jobs going overseas, struggling with health-care costs.....having the burden of providing social services, medical care through the emergency rooms of hospital (making our healthcare go up even more), providing interpreters...for millions of people here ILLEGALLY....not to even speak of the high cost of educating the children of these millions. I strongly suggest those who support the "rights" of these illegals - adopt a couple of families.....have them move in with you, share your household, your food, pay for their healthcare, pay for the education of their childred....OUT OF YOUR FAMILY BUDGET!!! We'll see how long your hold on to your "head above the clouds" view........you would then have a right to bash those like Lou Dobbs.....once you, yourself, have the financial burden of caring for these uninvited guests.

Get real.....remember we are talking ILLEGAL!!!

OK. We realize that it is an utter waste of time to dispute Anna's "arguments", but we will analyze them, nevertheless.

Anna's main argument appears to be that "Those opposing his view of ILLEGAL immigration usually have their own ideology - that is that ANYONE who has a problem should show up in America to have their problem solved by tax-paying Americans." We will ignore her misuse of the term "ideology" in order to focus on the topic at hand--immigrants and immigration. Had Anna bothered to read our previous lesson on the straw man argument, she may have decided against sending her angry, spastically unfocused email our way. I challenge anyone to show us where we have argued that "anyone who has a problem should show up in America to have their problem solved by tax-paying Americans." Since we have not argued that point, that argument against us is simply sensationalist (not unlike Lou himself), absurd, and invalid.

And then, of course, we have the standard "He's only against illegal immigration" line. Good god. Please, people. I will say this one more time. We do not, have not, and will not question whether or not those who come here without proper documentation are committing crimes. We are questioning the validity of the current laws themselves. The fact that something is a law is not, in itself, any indication that that law is fair or just. For those who have difficulty with subtlety, I will use this easy to understand example again. Segregation was once law. Segregation was not fair or just. Laws can potentially be unfair or unjust. Follow me?

We are encouraging people to think about how fair it is that individuals find themselves in a global economic system that compels them to sell their labor on a transnational market in order to survive, but then punishes them for actually becoming transnational laborers. Also, because undocumented workers in this country are afforded the protection of very few rights and are therefore vulnerable, we are saying that it is very poor form to constantly blame the social antagonisms produced by that global economic system on the individuals who find themselves caught up in it. One could say that a guy who makes his money and fame on berating people with little resources or rights, those who are economically compelled to sell their labor in the United States for survival, is kind of an asshole. So, that's what we are saying.

Again: Social problems are not the result of poor people from other countries immigrating to richer nations. Social antagonisms are the result of systemic problems in the fields of politics and the economy. Yes, it is much easier to just blame the scapegoat of your choosing for all the problems in society, be that liberals, conservatives, immigrants, muslims, jews, whatever... But it is also intellectually lazy, and only serves to buttress the current injustices in the systems that have actually produced these problems. People who foster this sort of intellectual laziness are pendejos.

Insurgency Goes to Peru

abeckwith — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 15:49:50 +0000

While we haven't been updating this here blog recently, don't worry TSI is still in full swing. Other job engagements have kept us from updating the blog recently, but rest assured, we're still handling any and all orders and inquiries.

Meanwhile, if you need your Kyle or Justin fix, like we all do, check out their travel blog while they're down in Peru - http://hablavasperu.blogspot.com/

For Real?

abeckwith — Wed, 28 Jan 2009 17:22:42 +0000

Here's an amusing and scary post from "The Vine" - TNR's environmental and energy blog - which cites a study saying that not only does High Fructose Corn Syrup invade children's bedrooms at night, but also contains mercury. Not only that, but the FDA knew this and didn't do anything about it. So it goes.

http://blogs.tnr.com/tnr/blogs/environmentandenergy/archive/2009/01/28/a...

It's best not to think about things like this, so I'm going to distract you with THIS CRAZY PAIR OF SHOES!

Wha???

Capitol Hill Books Inaugural Gala this Saturday

abeckwith — Tue, 13 Jan 2009 20:31:28 +0000

For any folks heading into DC this weekend for Inaugural festivities, swing by Capitol Hill Books on Saturday from 5 - 8 for our Inaugural Gala. Kyle and I are currently debating the effervescence of various beverage options, but at the least we'll have beer and wine and 10% off all books on Presidents.

Afterwards, we might go see Gordon at Banana Cafe or just hit up 18th Amendment. Black tie optional.

Welcome to Obama's America

abeckwith — Tue, 13 Jan 2009 16:35:39 +0000

I like to think there's alot of people like me out there who for a long time though to themselves "I wish this beer I was drinking tasted alot more like Nerds." Well, everything stopped sucking once Sparks came onto the market, and for the last decade or so, everyone's been happy.

Looks like everything's going to suck again, cause MillerCoors is discontinuing Sparks. I think we all died a little today, but mostly it was children who died. Thanks, Obama.

Pendejos Aplenty... Episode 4

kburk — Mon, 12 Jan 2009 16:48:35 +0000

It truly is amazing how people we don't know feel compelled to email us and tell us we are wrong about stuff, especially given that we are just a satirical t-shirt company.

Here's our latest episode.

On Fri, Jan 9, 2009 at 7:43 PM, Mike wrote:

Y'all are missing the point about illegal immigration. Let me start by saying that I am NOT against Hispanics. I have a great admiration for the Hispanic culture. I served with Hispanics in the Army and was stationed in Panama for a while. My heritage is Irish... but I would not condone 2 million Irish here illegally. Illegal immigration is a security issue. Especially now, with the Mexican drug cartels expanding their violence, we do not want that in the U.S. Amnesty would encourage more illegal immigration... where does it stop? The U.S. is struggling economically and does not need the additional strain on our social services accomodating illegals. I know many reasons to prevent illegal immigration. How many GOOD reasons do you have to promote it? The U.S. is a nation of immigrants... but let people come here legally and do it right. Do y'all believe that we should reward people for breaking our laws? That's exactly what amnesty would do. Lou Dobbs is not a pendejo. Mr. Dobbs has reported on our government's lack of progress on securing our ports and borders from potential terrorists. The fact that we have some 10-20 million illegal Mexicans in this country is a testimony to that.

Mike

From: Tshirtinsurgency

To: Mike

Mike,

Congratulations on your admiration for the Hispanic culture. I am thoroughly convinced that you are not racist. Moving on...

Ok, so you believe the point we are missing is that illegal immigration is a security issue. What about our position--that Lou Dobbs is a Pendejo--indicates that we do not understand the importance of keeping violent drug cartels from entering the country? You didn't say, and that is strange. Presumably, if you feel confident enough to write people you don't know and tell them that they are wrong about something, you would explain why they are wrong in specific terms and examples.

And then, there's this:

"Amnesty would encourage more illegal immigration... where does it stop? The U.S. is struggling economically and does not need the additional strain on our social services accomodating illegals. I know many reasons to prevent illegal immigration. How many GOOD reasons do you have to promote it?"

This is an example of the logical fallacy known as the Straw Man; we have never once called for amnesty or promoted illegal immigration, but you falsely attributed those positions to us because it is easier to argue against fake positions which seem to bolster your "argument".

Our positions have been clearly stated on the website, so I won't restate them in this email. If you have an issue with one of our actual positions, and not one you just made up, then, by all means, act on your compulsion to let us know about your disagreement.

Hasta entonces,

Insurgent Kyle

PS: What and who are "potential terrorists"? Am I? Are you?

Pendejos Aplenty...Round 3!

kburk — Wed, 24 Dec 2008 14:52:36 +0000

Here's the latest. Debbie wants us to clarify our position on illegal immigration in simple terms (which we already did in the last excerpt of Pendejos Aplenty, but apparently that wasn't simple enough). She also objects to us promoting our t-shirt business.......on our t-shirt business website.

On Tue, Dec 23, 2008 at 10:19 AM, Debbie wrote:

Other than your shameless promotion of your flayling t-shirt bussiness, what is your real stand on ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION?
Are you for it?

From: T-Shirt Insurgency
To: Debbie Sent: Tuesday, December 23, 2008 2:18:02 PM
Subject: Re: POLITICO

That's a loaded question which implies the logical fallacy known as "false choice", thereby rendering it illegitimate. It is also unbelievably reductionist. (As if immigration exists in some quasi-ahistorical vacuum.) You also call our business "flayling" which is, of course, a presumption not based on fact. Also, "flayling" is spelled flailing, and "bussiness" is spelled business. Amazing how you could get so many things wrong in a two sentence email.

Thanks for playing, though.

Have a nice day.

On Tue, Dec 23, 2008 at 7:34 PM, Debbie wrote:

Esta es la respuesta que esperaba de un pendejo como tu.
Parece que hay muchos parecido a ti, desgraciado, en este pais.

(This is the response I expected from a pendejo like you. It seems that there are many disgraceful people like you in this country.)

From: T-Shirt Insurgency
To: DebbieSent: Tuesday, December 24, 2008
Subject: Re: POLITICO

Debbie, I'm sorry we couldn't provide you with a cute little soundbite answer like Lou would have. If you want simple, inadequate answers to complicated questions, by all means, keep getting your answers from simple people. The Insurgency, I'm afraid, is not in the habit of reducing complicated political problems down to a second grade reading level just so we can gain some sort of popular support.

I'm really sorry we insulted your tv news hero, but he is an asno if ever there was one.

Merry Christmas

One more Pendejo

kburk — Thu, 18 Dec 2008 14:45:12 +0000

One more excerpt from our new feature-- Pendejos Aplenty!

Another reactionary takes issue with our Lou Dobbs shirt!

On Wed, Dec 17, 2008 at 7:20 PM, Robert wrote:

Moron or Idiot (your choice), Get it right asswipe, he's against ILLEGAL immigration. What part of that do you not understand??? He believes, as I do, in the rule of law, as you apparently don't. Throw out ALL illegal's and end the birthright policy.
Deport 'em all.

From: T-Shirt Insurgency <
Date: Thu, Dec 18, 2008 at 9:31 AM
Subject: Re: Lou Dobbs
To: Robert

1. Once again, it is incredible how (presumably) native English speakers like yourself apparently do not know how to use correct punctuation in the sentences they write. It seems a particular problem amongst possible minutemen militia members like yourself.

2. We do not question whether or not there are certain laws that people immigrating to the United States are required to follow. We do not question the fact that those who do not follow them are guilty of crimes. We are questioning how just those laws are in the first place. I think you'll find, if you look through history, that some laws were not so just. This may be another such law. We are suggesting that the current structure of global capitalism coerces workers to move where the work is to survive, while at the same time punishing them legally for doing so. We are saying that the current system unfairly punishes workers, and that the system should be changed so as to not unfairly punish them.

3. We never said Lou Dobbs was against legal immigration. We know he says he's against illegal immigration. I'm not sure how you got so confused so as to decide you should call us asswipes for saying something we didn't say. Maybe you should read more carefully to avoid such confusion in the future. Our beef with Dobbs, asswipe, is that he too often uses his prominence not to fight for a more fair immigration policy, but instead uses his pulpit to rail against individual immigrants rather than the power structure that produces them.
To quote you, Robert, "What part of that do you not understand?".

Sincerely,

Insurgent Kyle

Philly and Boston Pictures

abeckwith — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 15:45:57 +0000

It's a little late in coming, but we got some photos from the Philly/Boston trip.

We fully enmeshed ourself in the hipster milieu in Philly. They even had free pabst! It's true - look how shocked I am to be festooned with Pabst:

The photo on the right was our neighbor in Philly, who was cool and sells Cupcake Monsters.

One of the other major highlights was us both for the first time hearing the weird "Snow/Heat Miser" song. It's completely ridiculous. This is the Heat Miser.

Anyway, the Philly show had some cool bands, a bunch of cool vendors, and Matt had what he says is his favorite breakfast sandwich of all time at the Arbol Cafe. A Wintry Mix rolled into town and we were off to Boston though.

The Boston Bazaar Bizarre was a damn cool event in the Castle at Park Plaza. Like all big craft events, there was a theraman, who was pretty cool the first time, but then almost drove us insane after awhile. You can only take so many theraman christmas carols.

Anyway, it was packed the whole time, and we managed to sell a fair number of shirts and have some great interactions with the vendors and customers. We were dead tired by the end, and headed out of town to the first Applebees we could find. Thankfully enough Pink and Rihanna (but not enough Nickelback for Matt's liking) came on the radio on the drive home to keep us awake.

Pendejos Aplenty

kburk — Mon, 15 Dec 2008 16:06:43 +0000

Recently, the Insurgency has been recieving lots of emails from anti-immigration folk. The Insurgency refuses to be cowed by their poor grammar and largely convoluted insults. Not only that, but we have decided that a public humiliation of sorts is in order. Of course, we should just ignore the minutemen militia members who write us stupid emails, but we are far too childish to not retaliate in kind. For your amusement, observe one of our favorite latest exchanges. (There are Spanish passages, but we have translated portions.)

2008/12/3

From: Phil

To: T-shirt insurgency

Dear Pendejo,
Yo creo cuando usted no sabe que decir hay que llamar una persona pendejo. ¿No es verdad? Pues el pendejo es ustedes por falto de pensar. Yo tengo muchos anos viviendo en países fuera de los estados unidos y el único derecho que un cuidando del cual querrá país latino tenia es el derecho de morir de hambre. Nosotros teníamos todo el derecho de hacer una llamada de atención cuando gente están entrando su país sin permiso alguno. No creo que Méjico, Colombia, Venezuela, Perú, Panamá estaría dejando que gente estaría pasando el frontera sin permiso. Por Dios ponga su nombre en su camisa por que el pendejo es en su reflejo.

Cansado,

From: T-Shirt Insurgency

To: Phil

Hola Phil, Oye, mejor escríbenos en ingles, porque el argumento suyo no se llega a entender así como esta escrito en español. No sé cuanto tiempo usted lleva en el extranjero, pero su español sigue de baja calidad. La Insurgencia estará feliz de seguir la conversación en un idioma que usted domine con mayor facilidad. Atentamente Insurgent Kyle

translation

(Hi Phil, I think it would be better if you write us in English since your argument is difficult to understand in Spanish. I’m not sure how long you have “lived outside the United States" (presumably in Latin America), but your Spanish is still of low quality. The Insurgency is happy to continue the conversation in a language you dominate more easily.

2008/12/4

From: Phil

To: T-shirt insurgency

Que pena, no me digas que mi español esta tan mal. Yo creo que si me entendio suficiente de otra manera no me uviera respondido. El argumento aqui es que usted llama a cual quier persona que se oponga al derecho de tener una opinion diferente de la suya, y usted lo llama "Pendejo"la mayoria de los paises tienen control de sus fronteras, por que nosotros no podemos tener ese derecho. Para combatir las drogas,terrorismo etc, hay que tener las fronteras vigiladas,eso es lo que Colombia ha hecho con la frontera con Venezuela,para no permitir los revolucionarios comunistas sigan apoyando a la FARC. Eso es uno de los ejemplos el por que es importante vigilar las fromteras, es un dercho como pais que tenemos, usted debe entenderlo verdad?

Date: Thu, 4 Dec 2008 13:35:01 -0500

From: T-Shirt Insurgency

To: Phil

Ughh... Ok Phil. Despite the spelling and grammatical errors that number in the teens, I will take a moment to look at your "argument".

So, first you say "El argumento aqui es que usted llama a cual quier persona que se oponga al derecho de tener una opinion diferente de la suya, y usted lo llama "Pendejo"" (btw cualquier is one word)

We didn't call everyone who has an opinion different than ours a pendejo. We called one person--Lou Dobbs--a pendejo. So you lose that argument.

Round two:

"la mayoria de los paises tienen control de sus fronteras, por que nosotros no podemos tener ese derecho."

I defy you to show me where we said that we should not attempt to "control our borders" (whatever that means). We didn't, so you lose that round as well.

"Para combatir las drogas,terrorismo etc, hay que tener las fronteras vigiladas,eso es lo que Colombia ha hecho con la frontera con Venezuela,para no permitir los revolucionarios comunistas sigan apoyando a la FARC."

This "sentence", if it can really be called that, is all over the place. I really can't tell what you are saying too much, so I'll just say that I'd like some examples of "terrorists" who have illegally come into the country through Mexico. All the 9-11 hijackers entered this country legally.The Colombia/Venezuela discussion is a whole different discussion. You kinda just seem like a college student who has studied abroad in Latin America and are really eager to prove you know some small political details about the region.The Insurgency is bemused.

"Eso es uno de los ejemplos el por que es importante vigilar las fromteras, es un dercho como pais que tenemos, usted debe entenderlo verdad?"

I'm not sure where you think this "right" to a secure border comes from, but when this "right" comes at the expense of the suffering of others, the question complicates itself. There is also the Universal Declaration of Human Rights . Check out number 13, for example.

Our beef with Lou Dobbs isn't that he would like to see immigration reform of some sort, we all would. Our beef with him is that he too often projects his malcontent onto the immigrants themselves who are just looking for a better life like all of the rest of us. His angry rants do nothing but rally hostile feelings against the most vulnerable population in the country. Usted debe entenderlo. ¿Verdad?

Ok, no more semi-unintelligible emails, please.

Thanks.

On Thu, Dec 4, 2008 at 7:37 PM

From: Phil

To: T-shirt insurgency

You really are full of yourself.

First I had my second conversation proof read by a spanish speaker so you have insulted that person. Round one you lose.

Second: The world is full of people who would like to come to the US and just because Mexico is on the border does not mean they should skip the legal process. Second Round you lose. (Ok, I have to say that this is my favorite sentence of the entire exchange. He outright says "I say they should do X, so they should do X, ergo, you lose the argument... Beautiful.)
Third:
Drugs and violence are coming from Mexico and should not be allowed to enter into our country. Mexico has had a long history of bad and corrupt governments that have allowed the mexican people to be held down and for the most part kept poor. This is not a American problem this is a Mexican problem that needs to be addressed in Mexico and not here. If Texas and California were still part of Mexico the illegal's would be just entering further north of the present border. Its the type of government that does not allow for the progress of the Mexican people. Mexico leads the world in the number of millionaires because its a rich and poor country with hardly any middle class. I think that the border needs to be fenced and guarded so that if a person in Mexico wants to immigrate to the US he needs to go through the same challenges that a person in India or Colombia needs to do no short cuts. Is this too hard for you to understand? Every country in the world protects its border or it will eventually cease to be a country. I absolutely love Colombia and lived there for many years and have a great respect for it's heritage and customs and language. I would never force or even expect Colombia to change because I felt uncomfortable with it's laws and regulations. I would respect it's ways without question or leave. Unfortunately the people running over the border do not respect my country and it's laws or even it's customs and language. This is the root of the problem just because life here is still good and hopefully will continue and even that may change in the future, does not give a person in another country the right to violate it's laws and statutes. Third Round you lose.

(Again, a beautiful "paragraph".)

Date: Fri, 5 Dec 2008 09:18:12 -0500

From: T-Shirt Insurgency

Subject: Re: Pendejo

The Spanish speaker did a poor job proofreading. That isn't an insult, just a fact.

Just because something is the law doesn't make it correct. (See segregation, for example)

Third: Your weltanshauung is far too simple for the Insurgency to interact with further. It's like debating a little kid. No fun. Even your English is poor. Go away, please.

Have a nice day.

On Mon, Dec 8, 2008 at 9:24 AM,

From: Phil

To: T-Shirt insurgency

The problem is you have been out debated. Again when you can't win an augument you insult or call names very typical. You are a communist and nothing I say will make sense to someone with a socialist communist bent like yourself.

From: T-Shirt Insurgency

To: Phil

Learn to use commas and spellcheck, Phil. Now I know why you have such difficulty communicating in Spanish, it's because you can't express yourself well in English either. Let's have a comma lesson. Your second sentence "Again when you can't win an augument you insult or call names very typical" is ill structured. The sentence should read as follows:

Again, when you can't win an argument, you insult (missing object) or call (missing object) names--very typical.

What is a "socialist communist"?

PS: Did you send that last email all by yourself like a big boy, or did you have someone proofread it for you again?

Keep 'em coming, you have no idea how many laughs my friends and I are getting out of your emails. Socialist communist... hahahaa.. More of those, please.

And that is basically our message to all of you hate-mailers--Keep them coming. Your hate mail provides us with wonderful anecdotes to recount at the bar.

That's all for now, we'll keep you updated.